been reading 2 emotional aquarians blog entry. how is the leo doing man? hahaah

well as usual..i choose not to talk abt it. maybe even prideful to admit i'm definitely missing e feeling.

Anyway..

rang msg me today, askin if i wanted to go gym. i only replied, 'haha u on, i onz' went clementi gym..we both did eddy style. she did her old weights whilst i did puny weights tt didnt exceed 3kg. we did almost all e stations like we did in the past. my legs r seriously achin frm the self-inflicted torture or squats n lunges frm e past 2 gym session. conditioning comes with a price..

aches.

went big bookshop with her. we both lamented how we were both outta sch ald, yet we still had to study. she has to study for her navigation stuff, while i..Home Loans, Auto Loans, Deposits, etc.

imagine how ridiculous it was when she went big bookshop to get pencils, sharpener, jotter books, while i went to buy an exercise bk, a pen n highlighter.

"back in sch, u can bank on certain modules to study n dun do well for others..now u cant. muz do well in everything"

for her, failing means confinement coz nd to re-take. for me, failing means having to stay back to re-take. which affects performance.

welcome to my world.

wad does it mean to 'have a life'?

does not gg out on a fri nite means tt someone has no life?

well in tt case i really have no life. coz i went to church on fri nite aft work. juz felt like attending the talk by fr richards. tired as i was, weary..even some failed attempts to stay awake. i went for it.

work is quite demanding. its like..i feel i'm constantly forced outta my comfort zone. i failed the home loans test. the one which i left earlier juz so as to attend the sports awards. had to re-take the test. i hate it tt i didnt get it right once.

felt like shit. but if there's anything i shd ask from God it's not for an easy way out, but instead for strength n courage to face whatever comes.

every morning monica wld come debrief us on what's there to expect for the day. on fri, i was given a big shock when she mentioned tt i was gonna do 'solo'. e others in my batch of colleagues were paired up to take call.

it's extremely ez to ask 'why' when things dun go ur way. obviously, i started to question. i mean, seriously. coz if there's anyone who shd do solo first, it shd b audrey. audrey is my colleague who was previously frm dbs, n she has like 3 yrs prior experience in customer service.

"Lord, why me?"

b4 i set up my computer n stuff, i decided to juz say a prayer. for strength, for courage. come what may.

havent been running. only ran once diz wk..on thurs. went back campus to run. apart frm tt havent been trg for marathon. went to gym todayn did eddy's style. for lower body..squats, lunges etc. nd to condition my knees to handle the stress for 5hrs. hah 5hrs is juz a conservative estimate to finish 42.195km. nd to clock more mileage but dun think its possible. i'm getting flabbier! rah.

anw marcus if u ever come to view my blog..yes i got go church k? tsk. tts like e 1st qn u'd alwayz ask when u c me. hrmf

went for trg ytd. went for my own run towards cosy bay, aft tt chat with rang whilst waiting for the gals to come back. bc rang n i were assigned to b on the junior boat.

if there's 1 thing i realised today, it is tt there's someone more 长气 than theresa. maybe its smtg in ocs? or maybe she was ald like tt last time? i dunno man. bc n i juz looked at each other n laughed to ourselves, whilst our drummer kept gg on n on. lol ;]

paced for 1 set in e attempt to get e juniors understand the idea of transition. i asked our drummer to demo e difference in body movement coz i knew she wld do a gd job explainin in e detailed manner as she ald was doing. hahah

somehow i juz thought abt 烂萍果 whilst reflecting. everyone requires tt kinda believe from others tt they can do it b4 they can shine. sometimes all it takes is a little bit of praise, or some attention. often, neglect is the reason y pple fall away, or lose confidence.

they kinda 'got it' by the 8-10th set. quite proud of them for their little victory.

was permanent fixures on e big boat, whilst liming switched other crews to the big boat tt i was on. i really cui in my anaerobic. during the charge, i was juz kinda prayin tt it'll be over soon, lest my heart malfunction. was extremely exhausted n was panting severely..i can no longer keep up with them. manda's paddle hit into mine a few times, a stark indication tt i'm waaaay to slow in execution. ez row back felt like 70-80% to me.

ahhhh!

GE 10 km run was alright. aim to clock < 1hr 10min. during the run i revised my expectations upwards. ran with zy for the 1st 3km, den she told me to go ahead w/o her. did some simple calculations. told myself tt i can actually finish it below 1hr if i pushed harder. so long as every 1km i take at max 6min to clear, i'd clock a timing under 1hr. cheez wasnt here to run wif me so tiz was kinda like e 1st run tt i did by myself, hence i had to pace myself.

every km i past, i glanced at my watch to ensure tt i was in gd time. by 8km i was at bout 46min+, but den aft tt i juz had tiz stitch which hurt frm right to left. there were moments i felt like puking but was tellin myself not to, coz it wld b v unglam. unlike the usual runs where i'd stride n sprint to e finishing, i jogged in diz time. cant afford to puke, n with all these recent incidents of pple pushing too hard n dying aft race/marathons, i chose to b cautious.

came in under 1hr.

had breakfast @yakun wif zw, hb, angela, twin, twin's sis, twin's sis husband, n zy. thankfully, e puking sensation dissipated. alot of gals frm the team came for diz event, includin lm, lj, yc (hmm i didnt c her though), n some juniors.

when at lunch ytd with bc n rang, we were commenting bout how the team no longer goes for lunch/dinner aft trg. aft trg, go mug. since we r all out at work, we know how little of wad we studied is applicable at work. not sayin they shdnt study, but there's smtg abt nua-ing tt sadly, is lacking these days. heh

crapped for close to an hr wif zw hb n angela. its damn theraputic to juz sit down n nua. abt L n S n B..stupid acronyms n codes we came up wif. cldnt help but chuckle when zw is equally, if not more lame than i am. got e same frequency n laugh at the same stupid things. *paddle shake*

body ache like crazy.

sports awards 07..here we go

manda (pheww wheet) n i.. meiling
my econs buddy..zw where's my 义气豆奶？
e big head family
proud father with the yr2s
He's The Man! check diz out ;p
e original c ginnas. now old ginnas
angela
taekwondo display
n for a moment u taut it was commencement ceremony huh?
dun u think diz looks like a scene frm 红星大奖？十大最受欢迎 女艺人。。
“能被入伪是一种肯定，得奖就如。。花红！”
and the emmy goes to... *drum rolls*
Sports Team of the Year--LadiesDragonboat Mens Team.
the aftermath
looks familiar huh? hahah they still re-use tiz pic even aft so long
the finale song.
previously frm ncc
huibing n liming
wenting raine
interiorly weird gross thing, n i.
doubles
heh no comments
left my work earlier on wed to rush down for sports awards. left my test early, despite the fact tt i havent finished. felt v lousy. juz feel tt imminent feeling of not being able to do well. i want to do things right the 1st time, every time. guess it's not possible.

i was disappointed n upset wif myself. forced a smile when i reached UCC. i was still feeling affected bout work.

sports award is so glamarised these days. was actually thinking bout e snrs who had journeyed with us, but yet r not here to join us on stage.

thanx. to the past, present n future.
NUS Dragonboat Ladies 06/07. Not juz rowers, but fighters

DnD on 161007..here we go

drinks bar
the menu. 8 course dinner..woohoo
my colleagues n i --audrey, agnes, joan n i.
the newbies--us! harry, shawn (our trainer), thomas, willie, irwan.
front row: monica (our grad bay manager), audrey, agnes, joan n i.
us with our boss, angela.
traded tiz..for this.
sharks fin soup
clip frm the show 300. since the theme for DnD was 'prepare for glory', n everyone was encouraged to dress up like warriors.
stir fry scallops with celery
salted chicken in some sauce
fish!
yam basket

shagged man. by the time everything ended it was 1030pm. the MC was so unprofessional. He didnt manage to rouse the crowd n we were so bored! apart frm the eating..

i feel stressed. my learning curve is v steep at tiz stage..n i feel lousy ;[

updates..last wk

been doing mentoring n listen in for the past week. mentoring means i take 'live' calls with my mentor beside me to help out. listen-in meant i'd listen n learn frm my mentor n how they handle customers.

went to celebrate theresa's bdae on thurs nite. it was pretty enjoyable eating at sunshine place, n though i'm no fan of crabs (coz i dunno how to eat), i ended up appreciating the dish at the end of the meal. i was the last to arrive, n i cld actually spot the table of them coz i saw a familiar someone playing with her hair, pulling the fringe. yup, zw..still no change. lol ;] actually some things really dun change with time. eg theresa who nv run out of things to say, lj baby's leg shaking habit, yc's mm-hmm, jo's appetite (hahah ;p), angela's shrugged shoulders.

went out wif e clique on fri nite. we ate at komala, diz indian fast food restaurant. aft which we went to raffles city in the hope of getting dessert. since there was no place tt cld accomodate a big grp of 11, we settled at the food court. it was there tt i felt v sleepy n my eyes was reduced to a slit. i really cant stay past 11pm on week nights..i noe they were laughing at my garfield eyes. boo ;[ haha wad to do? i cant stay past 11pm, n cant sleep past 7am these days.

went to collect the Great Eastern Race Pack on sat b4 gg down to meet my batch. i'm v sad coz my race bib was defective, in tt it did not have my name printed on it. n yah, 2 person came to ask me for directions when i was collecting my race pack. Its not even half of the mth n my i-counter has registered 4, meaning 4 person has came to ask me for directions ald. i taut i no longer have e i-look. mayb i still do. wel mayb my mission here on Earth is to provide direction frm pple. ha seriously, i get like 5-7 pple per mth approachin me to ask for directions. n its at the oddest, least expected moments. eg when i'm checking my sms (n there's a whole lot of pple ard me to ask), or like when i'm running! yes, a guy actually stopped me while i was running, to ask me how to get to boon lay interchange.

went to meet my batch coz wt pulled us to go shop wif her.jul cldnt come coz she had to finish up her endless assignments. so it was e 5 of us. ended up wenya went shopping wif wt, leaving raine rang n i doing our own (sitting ard hahah) was tellin raine tt she n rang seemed like a couple while i looked like a tag-along. in e end rang got tired, i got bored of shopping so we left those 2 to shop, while we went to catch 'balls of fury'. Pls refrain frm watching tt show coz its really plotless n juz crappy. the thing i liked the most of the movie was..the popcorn. we took a pic at food republic, b4 raine left early. dun u think i look fat? or does my head look exceptionally big in contrast to raine? when i took a glimpse of e pic, for Quality Control purpose, i lamented how old we look. how we lost our youthfulness. wt burst out laughin at me when i casually remarked, 'i weigh 54kg now n i can do 1 and a half pull ups' i noe its v pathetic but i dun nd to do pull ups no more wad. its kinda weird in the sense, listenin to wt n raine update us bout e team, yet know we cant do anythin bout it. its juz normative statements. 'den u shd..' 'but they shd..'

aft 6wks, wt n i passed our basic sculling course. now we r on e waiting list for e advance course.

rmb i mentioned last wk bout God providing? damn shiok coz the vending machine at pandan reservoir didnt register when i place a dollar inside n have ald claimed my soy bean drink. hence, we got e chance to share another free can of drink!

and if tt's not ald gd enuf, the machine dispensed a change of 10 cents. essentially, the vending machine paid me 10c to drink 1 free can of drink.

超神奇！

mass today was abt 10 lepers who were healed, but ony 1 who came back to give praise and thanksgiving. how apt.

i feel fat. i'm still hovering at the same weight as b4, but i feel flabbier ;[ wanted to go back campus to run on fri, but work ended late coz we got a HUGE surprise (or shd i say, shock) aft monica told us tt we'd be doing mentoring n listen-in today. mentoring meant, we were gonna take 'live' calls, with a mentor beside us.

stressss can? seriously we werent prepared for tt coz we werent told abt it. it was supposed to be juz listen-in to calls.

dun really wanna comment on tt ;[ it required plenty of multi-taskin n seriously, u gotta know ur stuff at ur fingertips.

by the time work ended, it was 650. decided upon eating at clementi n aborted plans of running coz it was ald late.

bcoz i felt quite unprepared n inadequate, i headed back to office on sat. didnt want anyone to see but eddy (a guy 1 batch b4 me) saw tt i was in the trg room. he popped by n talked to me, giving me some tips on wad to look out for, etc.

n today, wad did i do? i went for sculling in the morning. i was wondering wad its like to leave stuff in God's hands n let him provide without having me to worry. i had 50c in my wallet, hence i wouldnt be able to buy a drink frm the vending machine aft the sculling session. Low n behold, when i changed out of my sports attire into casual smart clothes, a 50c dropped outta the pocket.

i smiled to myself, looked up to the sky n said, 'thanx God' hence i got my chilled soy bean can drink.

by the time lessons ended n i headed out of pandan reservoir, it was ald 11. i had wanted to take a cab down to holy cross church, so tt i'd be in time for mass at 1130. a car passed me as i was walking out the uneven tracks. it came to a stop. tiz guy frm our grp (frm hawaii) asked if i wanted a lift. i asked if it was along the way. he mentioned he was gg towards clementi rd. Bingo! holy cross church is at Clementi Ave 1.

hence i got a free ride to church n was 15 min early.

Again, i grinned to myself, looked up n said a prayer of thanx.

mass today was on the disciples asking Jesus to "Increase our faith" curbed all temptations to fall asleep although i felt damn shagged frm sculling session today. it wasnt much tt we did, but i seriously want to pengz frm the boat carrying. today both of us took a single scull each, hence we carried e boat our ourselves. its not tt heavy as the wooden boat. but carrying it long distance will eventually make us tired.

shagged.

it is only today tt i realised e huge sense of security tt i feel when i'm with my dad. today, i think he muz have realised his little girl has grown up. perhaps he has all these while worried unnecessarily. i think dad n i have diz form of quiet connection. we hardly talk but i can sense tt he is always patient wif me. though he may not know me as well as mum. eg he tinks my fav colour is pink. maybe its in his wish tt i like pink, juz as most girls do. mayb tts y he dun like me to go for gung-ho stuff. mayb tts y he's so protective over me. but i love him juz the same. my dad with the big tummy.

all in a day's work

had induction today. basically it entails everyone who has been newly employed by the bank within the past 3-5wks, to sit in and listen to talks by the head of depts. its a whole day thing, so there were like 50+ pple frm all sorts of department frm the Comsumer Financial Services (CFS) who had to attend it.

there were those frm branch banking, wealth management, private banking, premier, offshore bankin, consumer banking etc, who attended.

well they did some successful brain-washing. dept heads came in to sell the bank's positive image, how we r different frm other banks. how we r e ranked 3rd, coming behind Citibank n another bank (which i forgot), but tt we r ahead of the other 2 local banks. ehh..n how we r emerging but juz tt we dun shout abt our achievement. hahah omg. the underline is..there's reason to b proud tt we r employees of tiz bank. (actually i'm ald proud of being part of the bank n felt its not tt necessary for e reassurance hah)

well i guess the only gd thing abt e 1 day induction is the tea break. n its quite slack coz we had a damn long lunch break. 1 1/2 hrs instead of the usual 1hr. they really fed us well, n wif gd food too. feed us gd now den work us like crazy aft tt.

went to open the step-up acc @citibank during lunch time. its diz salary crediting acc recommended by whenyah, plus aft doing some mini research i felt its quite gd so i went ahead.

guess who i saw? i was expectin to have to line up in e queue to wait for my turn, but i got a pleasant surprise when someone called my name. i turned back n saw tt it was jiahe. he agreed to help me open the acc although he dun usually do tt (tink he's more involved in other more impt stuff), hence saving me alot of them coz i no nd to queue, but was instead welcomed to his desk where he opened e acc for me.

ha wad else wld we talk abt other than db. told him i was working at where he previously work in. we talked quite abit, i commented tt he looks so much smaller than b4. well back then, 2 yrs ago in fact, when he was e capt he was huge n defined. i was worried tt there'd be awkward silence n running outta stuff to say. thankfully there wasnt n it was nice experiencing his customer service. apart frm the point where he commented 'eh u r born in e mth of aug, on 19th? me too..i'm born on the 15th' n i was like 'ohh, wow..'-_-^

wad else cld i carry on saying other than tt? hahah i cldnt 接下去.

anw went back to the auditorium back at o*bc to attend induction. mingled abit durin e tea break session. tiz guy was telling me abt how the bank has a db team n asked if i was interested to join. "They r quite a serious team. train twice during the wk, n have been performing well during regatta"

of which i replied, "yup, 1st in inter-corporate in 2003 regatta" didnt tell them i'm juz not ready to join any team. i'm contented wif sculling for now.

there was some mingling n there was diz lady whom i chat wif. i dunno how we started talkin but there was diz part where she said, 'u noe cindy, i love ur shoulders. its so broad, not like those narrow kind. makes u look gd' n once again, i was stun n cldnt think of how to 接下去. i juz thought its so hmm, weird. coz 1) i hate my broad shoulders n 2) tt juz dun sound rite. so i juz said 'hmm..thanx?' although i was like -_-" inside.

the induction session ended wif dinner at the executive 33rd floor. peach garden. its tt kinda posh n plush place where the waitress go ard with beer, coke, orange juice on their trays to serve us. buffet style expensive food. u noe tt kinda thing? then the big shots talked n aft tt we helped ourselves to the food. i was tired of interactin so aft a while, we left. by then it was ald 7pm.

tts all in a day's work.